Who hasn’t or doesn’t struggle with this? There’s something you want to do or have for yourself or for someone you love but, your bank account says, “No. Sorry. Not going to happen – at least not today anyway.”
Last week at my youngest son’s soccer practice, Coach reviewed this season’s competition schedule and stated that he wanted commitments by the end of the week. There was one tournament that was getting to me and that tournament is less than 6 weeks away, involves roughly 14 hours of driving over one weekend, and is happening just days before Thanksgiving. My triggers? Time and money.
The following morning, as I was having a quiet chat with myself about the time and money involved, I heard myself say, “In my heart of hearts, all I want is to be able to say Yes to my son because of how hard he works and because I know how much he loves the game.”
Then it hit me.
As I was considering saying No, because the timing and financials were not appearing to align, while really wanting to say Yes, I realized that this decision has nothing to do with what I think it does.
Truthfully, my wanting to say Yes has nothing to do with a soccer tournament being 7 hours away and 4 days before a holiday. My wanting to say Yes really has nothing to do with my son, his team, or even the money.
My wanting to say Yes to this tournament is really about my secret desire to be able to say Yes to me. This is really about me … saying Yes to ME.
That realization literally took the breath out of me. Then, miraculously, I felt light as air.
This wasn’t the first time I was saying No when I wanted to say Yes. It’s not the first time when I believed that time and money was getting in my way. But, I believe this was the first time I opened the door that would take me to the truth of what was really stopping me from saying Yes.
Does this sound a bit familiar to you too? Wanting to say Yes while everything else seems to point to No? And are you too done with the frustration and disappointment that comes along with it? Yea- me too.
Here is what I propose we do … together. Let’s be children again. Let’s go back to being a kid.
Yes – you heard me correctly but, hang on a sec. Before I share my ideas with you, please let me make something clear. I am not suggesting we become irresponsible, flippant, or spoiled brats. In fact, by following my suggestions, we will be holding ourselves accountable while infusing more ease and Yes’s into our lives!
Idea #1: Have a chat.
Do you remember when you were a child, a young child, you would talk to yourself – a lot? I know I did. And I have also noticed that lots of small children, before they are consumed by today’s technology, they have wonderful conversations with themselves. So, find a quiet place and have a chat … with yourself.
You will notice that the voice that responds makes a lot of sense. That voice, while quite firm at times, seems to know exactly what you need to hear.
Newsflash … that voice you are hearing … it’s a version of you. That voice will tell you why you aren’t saying Yes right now and what you need to confront, forgive, and release in order to change your No to a Yes.
Now don’t worry about having to take notes during this chat – that’s an adult-thing. Be like a child and simply enjoy the chatter. I promise that you won’t forget what you are told or what you will learn about you.
Idea #2: Trust. Just trust.
I know, I know … easier said then done. I get it. But, think about this for a moment. If you are a parent, you know firsthand how your young child trusts you implicitly – with everything. Even if you are not a parent – I’m sure you know what I’m talking about here.
Young children will allow their parent to lead them, care for them, and protect them. Because of this, children are left to be free. Free from worry, hardly a care or even a doubt. A young child is then also free to play, have fun, explore, and imagine. Can you remember those days – when you were that young child?
Now, that voice, the one you recently had a chat with, that’s your Father, the voice of God.
So, if you can trust your earthly father and feel safe in saying Yes, then how is it that you don’t or won’t trust your real Father now? The One who sees only your brilliance and light. The One who faithfully protects you with His unconditional Love.
Listen to His voice, trust, and follow His lead. Has He ever steered you wrong before? Never.
Idea #3: Laugh.
I’ve been told that laughter is the language of the Holy Spirit, reminding us to not take ourselves or life so seriously. A child does this best. Even when something “serious” is brought to a young child’s attention, within a flash they transform that seriousness to pixie dust, and skip away giggling.
Whatever it is that you say is preventing you from saying Yes, whether it’s money, time, your work or a relationship, I’m not saying that you laugh it off as to ignore it. What I am suggesting is that you approach a decision or a choice with the attitude of a child.
Be lighthearted. Feel easygoing. Feel playfulness within. The wild thing is, when you take on that child-like attitude, your inner-voice seems to get louder and more clear. It’s like the solution to a problem shows up out of thin air in the middle of a fit of giggles. It happens. I swear.
What I have discovered is this …
When I can’t say Yes and I think it’s due to a lack of time, money, or something else, it’s really because there’s lack in me. I feel that I’m not enough which means I have forgotten who I really am (Spirit – Love) and that I already have everything.
How did I find this out? By having a chat and trusting what I was told by my Father.
So give yourself a break. Say Yes to you by having a chat with yourself, while listening with the mind of a young child, and trusting what your Father tells you.
Questions? Please leave a comment … I am always happy to help!
For information on Christine’s coaching services, upcoming speaking engagements, and published writings, please email firstname.lastname@example.org