…WHOLENESS. A recent insight that has been quietly, and not so quietly, nudging me to talk about. So this morning, before I got to my office, I asked the question, “what’s my ‘lead in’ to this conversation?” Sure enough, it never fails, I ask a question and get my answer! I came across an article online this morning, “Smart Women Marry Rich…” by Susan Donaldson James. It’s more or less about the ongoing debate over marrying rich versus marrying for love, romantic love. Always a juicy and controversial topic, yes? No attention was given however, to a woman’s (or a man’s) sense of Wholeness. Financial Wholeness. Empowerment. A strong, clear, confident sense of SELF.
It feels better to me to believe that in order to experience a successful marriage, or any relationship, you must feel WHOLE….emotionally and spiritually. Ideally, both individuals should come to the table complete unto themselves…with clarity of values, vision, and a strong sense of wealth. It would appear that this happens on occasion, all we have to do is look at the divorce rate. But, does that mean that living “happily ever after” is impossible? Does it mean that in order to experience a life of financial security and abundance, we have to settle for “Mr.Big Green Bank Account” instead of “Mr.Big Blue Eyes”? I now understand why that line in the movie Jerry McGuire never felt right to me…”You complete me.” So that meant he was “incomplete” with himself or within himself, somehow? Interesting.
In the Book of Runes, the Rune Sowelu stands for Wholeness, my favorite since I was a teenager. “This Rune stands for Wholeness, that which your nature requires. It embodies the impulse toward self-realization and indicates the path you must follow, not from ulterior motives but from the core of your individuality….At the same time, for some this Rune counsels opening yourself up, letting the Light into a part of your life that has been secret, shut away. To accomplish this may call for profound recognitions, for admitting to yourself something that you have long denied.”
My journey to Wholeness has been exactly as the Rune, Sowelu, describes. Recently I uncovered some painful memories that I had hidden away for many years. These memories have had a direct impact on my sense of Self…the feeling that I am not Enough. I finally came to realize that this negative belief had been the reason for my attracting abusive relationships, failed relationships, rollercoaster income fluctuations, and momentary blips of success followed by hitting rock bottom.
The good news is that no matter how painful a memory or experience may be, self-transformation always promises something new, brighter, and better! Consider this your chance to finally wake up to your truth…to discover what you really really want in your marriage, your partnerships, your business, your finances…your LIFE. Your relationship with your Self, with money, or with your spouse should feel easy, comfortable, fun, exciting…so practice the art of doing without doing. Practice the art of FEELING…and you will naturally flow into Wholeness.
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Wow It has taken me 29 years of marriage to figure this all out…This really says it like it is, and how you said it was just excellent..thank you Chris for all your wisdom at such a young age…
I’m glad you enjoyed and thank you! 29 years…wow, that’s HUGE!! Good for you…I know you’ve had your ups and downs, and I’ve seen you come a long way to stand in your power! You are inspiring! 🙂
Hi Christine,
Very interesting and enlightning. I wonder what it means to be in a happy
28 year relationship and never marry. Are you whole or are you not????
Have a nice day…
Sue